Bad Faith
Empathy is not a sin, no matter who says it is.
Empathy is getting a bad name in some circles. Some say that it’s hawked to weaklings and losers by moral snake oil salesmen. You might expect to hear this sort of thing from the adherents of contemporary right-wing vitalism. For instance, Costin Vlad Alamariu (writing pseudonymously as Bronze Age Pervert) argues that the strong should dominate and exploit the weak. It’s simple biology, he says, and there’s no God to tell you otherwise.
It’s a little more surprising to hear Elon Musk tell Joe Rogan that “the fundamental weakness of Western civilization is empathy.” You see, Musk describes himself as a cultural Christian. He says that he admires Jesus’ teachings. Since Jesus is not his Lord, Musk has the option to agree or to disagree with various things that Jesus says. So, considering the source, this statement is not so shocking.
By contrast, I’m stunned—no, actually, I’m appalled—to hear Christian pastors dismiss the centrality of empathy for the followers of Jesus. Joe Rigney, lead pastor at Grace Reformed Baptist Church, has published a book entitled The Sin of Empathy. Did you get that? Sin. Empathy is a sin?
Fortunately, Rigney’s book is not a massive best seller. Neither is it widely read in the mainstream. However, his rejection of empathy is beginning to resonate among the ranks of Christian Nationalists, a movement that has picked up significant steam.
My friend and colleague Bishop Rob Wright of Atlanta has called Christian Nationalism a heresy. Commentator Ross Douthat categorizes it, along with a number of other contemporary distortions of faith, as a bad religion in his book by the same title.
Briefly put, Christian Nationalism seeks to merge a specific version of Christianity with the identity of the United States. That is to say, it seeks to ensure that our laws, our leadership, and our cultural norms conform to the standards of conservative, mostly literalistic understandings of Christianity.
But as Douthat and others have pointed out, Christian Nationalism is actually a political ideology. It elevates nationalism rather than proclaiming Christ and him crucified. Along the way, it distorts Jesus’ teachings in service to the needs of the state. So, for instance, empathy can be dismissed as a Christian virtue especially in arguments about the place of women, our responsibility to the poor, and our treatment of refugees.
Look, I’m the first to say that people can mistake codependence for empathy. It’s a little harsh, but I do sort of like this well-worn saying: “You can’t set yourself on fire to keep somebody else warm.” As Brene Brown has pointed out, good boundaries are necessary for practicing deep and genuine empathy. And, as I’ve said elsewhere, empathy is an essential element of a full-hearted life.
The foundation of a full-hearted life is our relationship with the crucified and risen Jesus. Submitting ourselves freely to his love for us shapes us into who we were created to be from the very beginning. We become at once our True Self and an indispensable, irreplaceable member of the Body of Christ. Christ’s love flows from us to the world around us for the sake of the world’s healing. Even, and perhaps especially, to a world that does not know Christ’s love.
What marks us as Christians is love above all else. That’s what the ancients recognized about the Christians in the first centuries of our faith: look how those Christians love, they said. Romans could not comprehend why and how Christians could care for the poor, the sick, the hungry, and the dying who did not profess their faith. They loved their neighbor, no matter what. No exceptions. And so should we.
On the night before he was crucified, Jesus prayed for his friends. We overhear that prayer in John’s Gospel. In intimate conversation with the Father, Jesus says, "Righteous Father, the world does not know you, but I know you; and these know that you have sent me. I made your name known to them, and I will make it known, so that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them." (John 17:25-26)
The empathy that Christians practice is neither a mere sentiment nor some emotional softness. As Thomas Aquinas put it, love is a function of God’s grace. When we love we are participating in God’s own love. The love exemplified by the self-outpouring of Jesus on the cross.
In a world where empathy can be disparaged and can even be called a sin, the Christian community becomes a crucial force of resistance. The power we wield is love. Calling ourselves Christian and withholding the love that the crucified and risen Jesus pours into our heart is nothing short of what the atheist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre called bad faith. We would just be lying to ourselves.
Sabbatical
Friends, I’ll be on sabbatical starting June 15 and returning mid-September. I’ll continue posting on Fridays (some will be best-of posts). Wednesday podcasts will slow down to one or two a month. I’m considering making this the regular pattern for podcasting when I return. Would love to hear your feedback on that.
Speaking Events
My 2025 calendar is almost full. Requests are coming in for 2026. Here are some of the themes I’m covering these days:
Preaching in a Secular Age
Congregations in a Secular Age
The Gospel and Secular Spiritualities
Spiritual Practices for a Full-Hearted Life
Christian Discipleship in an Age of Secular Spiritualities
As always, contact Holly Davis to schedule an event with me:
Grabbing One of My Books
Click the image to explore some of my books:
It’s difficult to comprehend how a Christian would label empathy as sin. I used to wonder how the German church could be seduced by Hitler and Fascism. I now think I’m beginning to see history being repeated.
This is my take on the issue of love and empathy.
Our culture in America has been moving in this direction, roughly since the assassination of JFK. To truly experience, both the giving and receiving of
love and empathy, requires making ourselves vulnerable to another human being.
It's that vulnerability that has become a dirty word. It suggests weakness. We've schooled our children for generations that big boys don't cry. They must be tough. Only girls cry. And feel things. You add the impersonal electronic technology on top of that,and now neither feel comfortable making themselves vulnerable to emotionally open to life.
The word love has lost its meaning without the experience of feeling it.
I believe in love. I believe in God. I believe in the way of Jesus. It's not all sunshine, lolipops and rainbows.
But it's worth it.